Drafts on new perspectives (Soul Restoration part 3)
Why do we renovate old buildings or redo our homes? Usually because we are ready for something new. Perhaps the space has fallen into disrepair, or we are just ready for change. Our spiritual life requires maintenance, as well. We are all subject to entropy. I think about this every time I clean my house. I pull out the vacuum, the dog freaks out and everyone suddenly needs to be in a different room. But I’m stuck sucking up all the dog hair. I loathe vacuuming and apparently so does the dog. The worst part about this chore is that I know more dog hair will appear (within minutes, if not seconds). This is entropy. It happens everywhere! It not only happens on our kitchen floors and in our gardens, but in our friendships and in our spiritual lives, as well.
Thus, the need for restoration. The longer we let things go the harder it is to recover. When we buy an old building, we know it’s going to be rough because nobody has been keeping it up. The paint is peeling, the pipes are leaking, the wood is rotting; it’s usually a gut job. Once we have gone through the demolition phase, which I wrote about in part two of this series (check it out here) or if you missed part one about soul restoration (check that out here), it’s time to start designing the new space.
When we are updating buildings, we usually look for ways the space can be better utilized. How can we use this area to the fullest? I feel this way spiritually. I’m tired of my old way of doing things. I want something new. I have tried my way for a long time. I’m more than ready to try God’s way. A place I really struggle personally is to find joy. I tend to look at everything wrong with any given situation to the point of overlooking anything good. Can you relate to this? This was the culture of my family. There are many, many great things about us, but finding the bright side? Not so much. My uncle once told my aunt that she was defined by the things she hates. Yup.
I have to work so hard not to complain. I honestly don’t even always know I’m doing it; it just feels like talking to me. Do you have something in your life like this? Maybe you always put yourself down or you have no patience for anyone who doesn’t do things right (i.e., your way). Maybe you don’t make time for people, or you deal with a jealous heart. Whatever it is, are you sick of it? Ready to change?
Sick of it was how I felt about a month ago when we were in the middle of our second move in less than a year. An unexpected move. We sold our house (that I loved, but we wanted more space). Intellectually, I knew at some point we were going to have to move if I ever wanted more said space, but I wanted to just move into the next “dream” house. Well, this move was a multi-tiered plan that involved going into a rental while we looked for said new place. Let’s just say I was not finding the “joy.”
As events unfolded, there were steps in there nobody saw coming (especially me). For instance, we bought an old school building to renovate into living spaces with the plan of going in ourselves. While a very cool idea, this was not in my plans. But surprise, the school wasn’t ready anyway before we had to be out of our rental. So (wait for it) we bought a tiny cottage to remodel and move into in nine days. People said it couldn’t be done. Turns out it really can’t be done, and we had to spend a couple of nights in one of our Airbnb rentals that was available only because we were waiting for the air conditioner to be repaired. So, place to stay. Check. Any chance of sleeping after a near 100-degree day. No check.
I am not really one to swing with the punches. Thus, all the complaining. If I were to swing into any mental illness it would probably be a hoarder. I love to save things. I keep clothes from college. Scones from last week. So, you can see being forced into a minimalist lifestyle might evoke some complaining or just talking (however you see it.) So, as you can imagine I needed to do some redesigning of my thought life. I had painted myself into a corner. I was living in a small closet of complaints when I could be living in a whole tiny cottage. One day I caught part of a sermon on the radio about not giving into our compulsions. Ever feel like a sermon or article is talking just to you?
The Holy Spirit convicted me through the audible voice on the radio. It hit me so hard, I forgot about the library books I needed to return and sat in the car listening and then had to go on a long walk just to process where I was spiritually. My complaining and unhappiness had become an ugly habit, a compulsion. It was time to knock down some walls and rearrange the rooms. I had locked myself into a dark little corner when there was so much space. So much to enjoy. So much to be thankful for. That night I went for another walk, this time in my new neighborhood, and it was nothing short of magical. How had I not seen it before? I caught a glimpse of the sunset over the lake across the street, families gathered at outdoor tables lit with twinkle lights and someone played old music from the 40s and I thought, wow!, I get to live here?
I was so focused on the dollhouse-sized washer and dryer and the lack of counter space in my tiny cottage that I had missed the beauty of living near the lake and the simplicity and joy, yes joy, of having a small place. I felt like a veil had been lifted. Wait! I’ve been using this space all wrong. I wanted to paint over the hideous colors of discontentment and bitterness and redecorate with thankfulness and peace. I opened all the windows and aired the place out; gone was the musty stench of ungratefulness and in came the fresh air of a new perspective. I could never do this on my own. I needed the conviction of the Holy Spirit to open my eyes and my heart to what God had for me and this time it came to me over the radio air waves.
Renovating our soul is not just getting rid of the old but planning for the new. The new creature you are in Christ. Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. (2 Cor 5:17) One that can change, that can grow, that can find joy (or contentment or peace or forgiveness). The Bible says joy cometh in the morning. (Ps 30:5) After a hard season of demolition, it’s time to rethink, update and rearrange our lives. What do we dwell on? What do we talk about? How do we spend our time?
What’s one of the first things we want to do when we renovate? Have people over! Come see the changes I have made in my house or more importantly the changes the Lord has made in my heart. Before in this area I was ugly and selfish (pull out old photos), but now the Lord has changed my outlook. I see things through His eyes. We want to share the renovations in our homes and in our lives. Come over, have a meal, a conversation in this new space. I want to tell you what the Lord did for me. How things have changed by His grace. What’s the best part of a makeover story? The after shots.
Although we want to make changes for ourselves, we also make changes for those around us. I want to be a place people find safe and comforting. Relatable, yes, but someone that can move past the challenges and provide shelter for those in my “neighborhood.” I want to be useful to the Lord. The prayer of my heart is that God can repurpose my hurt and struggles to further His kingdom. The Lord will always be doing maintenance on me, but I want to be a place people can come to get shelter from the rain, inviting and warm . . . even if there is a lot of dog hair.
