Living Stones

September 17, 2023 by Emily Downs

When I say the word church, you probably picture a building. I live in what is often referred to as the Bible Belt of America; there are churches on every corner. And I mean, like every corner! I can hear the church bells from where I sit right now. I recently had a non-American friend ask me how anyone here picks a church when there are so many. Excellent question.

If I lived in Europe, I would be tempted to select my Sunday morning destination by which cathedral inspired the most grandeur in my heart. I’m a sucker for a beautiful building; the older the better. Have you read my article on restoring old buildings? I love architecture and if it’s old and crumbly, all the more. I’m willing to endure damp and drafty for Old World charm, but I will complain when a church has the air conditioning on too high or if they run out of coffee. So maybe I wouldn’t have made it in a 5th century structure after all.

Build your faith upon the rock of God’s word

Although we picture a building when we say the word church, be it in someone’s living room or a domed cathedral, we should actually picture people. Other believers are the “real” church. The building is simply that—a place to gather. The church is made of “living stones.” This idea comes from 1 Peter 2. Here Peter tells us that we, “as lively stones, are built up a spiritual house” and Jesus Himself, is the chief corner stone, of which all is built around.

Well, if Jesus is referred to as a “stone” in the Bible, how blessed are we to also be likened to these seemingly uninteresting pieces of rock that can be found laying around almost anywhere? So, I figured a further study on rocks would yield something interesting spiritually. As so often it goes, once the Holy Spirit has put this thought in my head, it pops up everywhere. I have never once thought of rocks as having a spiritual lesson to teach us: gardens, misbehaving dogs (my dog, Scout!) and children—sure, but rocks? But when it comes to eternal lessons, God leaves no stone unturned.

As it turns out, rocks are just waiting to teach us about God. So next time you collect a rock at the beach or arrange them around your flower beds or (gasp!) kick them down the road, think of how God uses even these lowly guys to preach His glory.

Rocks are likened to bread, to people, to the word of God and to Christ!

Satan temps Jesus to turn the rocks into bread. What a thought! Jesus has been fasting for 40 days (I would be tempted to eat a stone after, like one day of fasting). In his human form, Jesus is so hungry and of course He has the ability to turn something boring into something delicious, something inedible into wonderous bread. It is no doubt that Jesus can work miracles (something Satan certainly doesn’t doubt); he is not tempting Him to do it, rather to refrain from using his undeniable powers. Perhaps like me, you have no issue believing God can heal or rescue you, but you battle with why He doesn’t. Here Jesus could easily bring substance out of rock, yet for God’s glory, He doesn’t do it. Is it possible that the situations in our lives are meant to teach us and mature us for some greater purpose? The rocks stayed rocks to defeat the enemy. Do you have some rocks in your life that perhaps need to stay rocks?

The Bible also likens our hearts to stone. Ezekiel 11:19 says, “And I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.” I would be the first to admit that my heart can act stony. Sometimes I am unmoved by the needs of those around me because I’m too busy looking at my own wants. Perhaps I’m fed up with recurring situations or behaviors and I’ve grown weary of showing patience and love. Or worse yet, I’ve grown hardened to my own sin, it doesn’t bother me anymore. Are our hearts soft and sensitive to the prodding of the Holy Spirt? Are we being convicted to represent God well in difficult situations? In many ways it’s easier to have a hard heart. We can’t be hurt. If someone kicks our heart of stone chances are that they will get hurt, not us. Do we trust God with a soft heart?

“Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering . . . and above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfectness.” (Col 3:12, 14)

One stone or brick by itself is fairly useless, but when fitted together and stuck with mortar they become shelter and protection from the elements. Stone houses really stand the test of time because the material is so solid. A rock or a stone is hard to damage; it can really take a beating over time. God created the church at Pentecost (this story is found in Acts) but instead of making it a physical building, he made it a living body, so it would last generation after generation. We, today, are part of that same church started in the 1st Century.

coral reef living stones — lively stones

The church is a living organism made up of souls. It makes me think of a coral reef. A reef is something solid like a wall, but it’s alive; made up of tiny living organisms called polyps. They look like wee little flowers and they are all attached together to form this living structure where other animals and plant life can survive, yet the reef itself is alive!! This makes me think of the church—a place for shelter and protection (when done right), a place that is made up of living souls, all coming together to be sanctified, to be nurtured and to grow in faith.

What part do you play? Do you provide stability by being someone that is always there and available. Are you a good listener or ready with Biblical advice? Can you help someone physically who is struggling or financially who can’t cover their expenses? We are lively stones, making up the invisible church. While we do have a calling to spread the Gospel we are told to take care of each other, other believers; we are family. Discipleship, encouragement, teaching, correcting (in love) and understanding are all part of the coral reef that is the living church.

worship truth love encouragement — The Lord God made them all …

Have you ever looked at picture of an underwater reef? It is a bright and colorful place, made up of many different plants and animals that are part of the ecosystem. We, as a church, are joined to all people, kindreds, tongues and nations that call Jesus, Lord. We often do things a bit differently, but I believe God loves variety; look at how different He has made each one of us and still we are all made in His image. The church is a place of diversity, yet what unites us in Christianity, is that Christ is our corner stone—the rock of our salvation and we believe the Bible to be the inerrant Word of God, from which we take instruction. In this ecosystem, the orange fish and the purple plants are living on the firm foundation of Christ Jesus as Lord. “The LORD liveth; and blessed be my rock; and let the God of my salvation be exalted.” (Ps18:46). “The Lord is my rock and my fortress, and my deliverer; my God, my strength, in whom I will trust, my buckler, and the horn of my salvation, and my high tower.” (Ps 18:2). “He only is my rock and my salvation; he is my defence; I shall not be greatly moved.” (Ps 62:2)

God does not need us to praise Him. Jesus taught in Luke 19:40, that even if the people keep silent the rocks will cry out in praise. So watch out, we can be replaced by a mere rock. I, for one, am now completely intimidated by rocks. These guys are impressive!

rejoice in the lord Holy Spirit — Even the rocks will cry out …

Drafts on Demolition (Soul Restoration Series part Two)

July 19, 2022 by Emily Downs

Restoration is time-consuming. When we think of restoring old buildings (as we do in our line of work) or perhaps a work of art, we don’t jump to DIY. These are not quick “do-it-yourself” projects. This type of labor requires professionals. So it is, when it comes to my spiritual life. I don’t head over to the self-help section. Nope. This is not a job I can handle on my own—like doing electrical wiring or plumbing (and believe me, nobody would want me on those jobs). God is my go-to (be-all) professional consultant. And I need to consult Him everyday.

In my first article on restoration read here, I wrote about how God loves a project. He is in the business of restoration. Soul restoration. When He knocks on the door of our hearts, we have to invite Him in before he can start to do any work. Once we have greenlighted the project, He comes in with with the heavy machinery (the kind you need a license to operate). While the Lord does the heavy lifting, we do still have a part to play. We have been provided with a toolbox of our own.

Just as we don’t buy an old building to keep it the same, we need to be ready for God to make some changes in our lives. Am I willing to be renovated? This means the way I spend my time will change. I need to be ready to make reading the Bible a priority, almost a daily habit. In my 20’s, when I was trying to figure out this whole faith thing, I reasoned that I better actually read the Bible (like the whole thing) and not just the parts I saw on bumper stickers. Since then, I have read it from cover to cover, almost every year of my life. Just knowing what the Lord says does huge restoration work on our souls. As we learn His ways, down come some of the false ceilings and crumbling walls and we can start to see the framework God set up for our lives.

DEMO is always the first step in a big rehab project. Time for all the extra layers the space has acquired over the years to get ripped down. Old buildings have had many owners and often many uses. Depending on how old you are perhaps you have tried on some different personas over the years. We go through so many stages, good and bad, chasing after the wrong things, the wrong people. These stages can leave a mark in our thinking. I can still remember some of the lies people told me over the years that really colored the way I saw the world, myself and God. We need to take our thinking back to the studs. Get a clean slate and really dive into what the Word of God has to say about how we should think, live and treat those around us. The demo stage is messy and brutal as strongholds and negative thinking patterns get taken out to the dumpster.

Once all the old junk is moved out of the way (& this can take years); and you think you’ve sandblasted that pessimistic thinking out of your life . . . ahhh! there’s that mold growing in the corner again. I believe there is a demo stage of restoring our souls, but the maintenance is endless. That’s why I couldn’t just read the Bible through once and call it good. To stay on top of entropy (def: a measure of disorder; e.g., melting ice), I need to be constantly (daily is best) reading the Bible because old thinking and lies try to work their way back into my mind. I often think of it as feather dusting my mind; if I do nothing, just like dust, wrong thinking will build up. And just when you’re sure everything is sparkling clean the sun comes out and shows you all the corners you missed. Be sure to look under the furniture because dust bunnies love to hide out in the dark spaces.

What are some areas of your spiritual life and thought life that need to be demoed?

Maybe the way you think of yourself?

The way you think of God?

Or the way you relate to those around you?

How do you talk to yourself? Is it mostly negative and discouraging? What are some of the things you hear on replay? I’m doing a Bible study and one of the assignments was to write down how we think of ourselves. The adjectives I used were along the lines of not enough, lacking, failure. To my surprise almost every other woman I’ve asked about this has come up with the same type of words. Yet, when I look at the lives of these women, I think, “wow they got it together.” The enemy whispers to so many of us in the same way.

The warfare starts in our minds. It starts with how we think about ourselves and then it shows up in our words and in our lives. I often have to remind myself that I’m fearfully and wonderfully made (Ps 139:14), that God uses all different types of people (I Cor 12:4), that when I am weak, He is strong (Phil 4:13). A simple read-through of the Bible will show us that God does not use perfect people. Actually, apart from Christ, He uses exclusively flawed people. That alone stops some of those negative thoughts. Yup, I’m lacking, I can never measure up, I will never be perfect, but like that old building we’re rehabbing, despite all its flaws, we see its potential . . . and God sees ours.

When I can see God moving in my life, it’s easier to “feel” that He loves me and cares about me. It is when He is seemingly silent that I start to question His promises. I know He is a God of miracles and I believe He wants good things for me. Yet, when I’m in a time of waiting, I start to lose hope. I start to question what the Word says because I can’t see it in the physical world. I have to come to terms with my own expectations, my own time line, and my own plans for what I deem best. Often our faith is built in the “waiting” and faith is, after all, believing in what we can’t see, but know to be true nonetheless. Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. (Heb 11:1) There is no doubt we live in a fallen world and for me there is no doubt God can work miracles in lives and hearts. The place I struggle is between those two points. How about you?

Just as a room needs to be demoed, my expectations of the how’s and when’s in my life need some demo work.

There might be some walls that need to come down.

We are made for relationships. It may not feel like it to some of us. I tend to self-isolate when I’m sad or angry. I don’t want to talk to anyone and that includes God. Sure I can do crazy, crying prayers in the shower or while driving, but I’m not really all that interested in the answer, I just want to feel better. I don’t really want to figure out how I got here (again!). But often God will use other people to speak to us and in turn He uses us to speak to other people. Thus, the importance of relationships. We help each other. Yes, we need alone time and time with God, but he pours into us so we can pour into others. His Spirit moves us to speak into a friend’s life or forgive or rejoice with someone. Apart from the odd hermit we live in community. We have to get along. This has really been tested lately in the world. If we are ambassadors of Christ, what does that look like? And (surprise again) we have different takes on that so how do we manage in truth and in love?

This is a lot of demolition work on our thinking and therefore on our words and our actions.

Are we willing to be taken down to the studs?

Do we believe God knows what is best for us? (This one is really hard for me.)

If those old buildings could groan and complain when we are ripping away the old walls and ceilings, I’m sure they would cry out—it is hard, painful work—but the end result is worth it. In our heart of hearts we know it is best. We can’t hang onto that old rotting stuff; we want it gone, we want to be made new. We want to be stronger and more solid in our faith, in our worth in Christ, in our value as a child of God. We want the little foxes of doubt chased out. We want the birds (of prey) that peck away at the corners of our thoughts to fly away. We want to be restored. “I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” Jn 10:10b

God will restore us. It is hard hard work. But the result will be amazing.

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Take Heart: Why Our Struggles are important

Playing the Wrong Notes

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In His footsteps

February 08, 2022 by Emily Downs

I heard once that as soon as they finish painting the Golden Gate Bridge, it’s time to repaint again. Well, that’s how shoveling the driveway has been lately. So faced with yet another snow day, I needed to run into work and my son was along for the ride. We were greeted with an unplowed driveway (or possibly one that was shoveled 10 minutes ago; it’s hard to say) and since he had left his boots at school, he was clad only in tennis shoes. As I am not in the habit of leaving my winter gear at various places (seriously, every time I walk by the lost & found at school, I need a laundry basket to haul it all home), I laced up boots for the blizzard and he did not. Alas, being the great parent that I am, I said, “I will walk to the door in my tall boots and you follow in my footsteps, since the snow is literally up to your knees . . . which is why we have boots.” Anyway, who can bother to remember appropriate foot wear? (Not him!)

I was equipped to handle the weather. I had donned all my armor, so to speak: coat, hat, gloves, (clears throat) boots. I had checked the weather report and saw blizzard and got out the big guns—my Russian princess coat, the gloves you can’t even bend your fingers in and a hat, complete with the ball thingy on the end (that means you are serious, by the way). I was ready to go. I’m one of those weirdoes, who kind of likes winter, but fully know part of the reason is that I’m well prepared for it. I have good gear, so I don’t feel the icy chill one would, say, without a coat and boots.

I do believe it’s a fairly common phenomenon for children to not want to wear their coats and hats. In fact, in my house it’s almost a daily argument.

Me in a bewildered tone: “You need a coat; it’s 12 degrees out there.”

Said child: “But if anything, I’m too hot right now.”

Me (still bewildered): “Yes, well, you are inside where it is heated, but you are about to enter the tundra where the wind chill is like 8 degrees. I promise, you will want a coat.”

With no faith and under threat of duress, said child, dons his coat as if he is doing me a favor! Then 20 minutes later wants to come in because . . . wait for it . . . he is cold.

Children and so many of us tend to live in the moment, don’t we? Everything is fine now; I’m warm and don’t need any more layers. The Bible tells us . . . In this world, you will have trouble (John 16:33). . . We are warned over and over again that we need to be ready for battle. Our enemy, Satan, has a blizzard planned. We know it’s coming because we can check the forecast (the prophetic Word of God) Yup, 100% chance of warfare; wear your winter coat. Parents, teachers and reasonable adults can look outside and see snow and logically say, you will need your boots. God has also “looked” outside and knows that storms are coming.

Our All-Knowing God, like any good parent wants his children to do well in the elements and, say, not lose a finger to frostbite. So, he gave us some gear to put on. It’s called the armor of God. You can read all about this armor in the book of Ephesian (chapter 6) and there are many good studies that focus on this crucial teaching of the Bible. I have done several, but one of my favorites is by Pricilla Shrier, called the Armor of God. I highly recommend it.

When you get ready to go out in the world put on your:

Belt of Truth

Breastplate of Righteousness

Shoes of the Gospel of Peace

Helmet of Salvation

Sword of the Spirit

Shield of Faith

We, in our ignorance or immaturity, don’t always think we need these things. We are comfortable and from our point of view, we can’t see any warfare. But God, our loving Father, says to put it on daily. We don’t always like to listen. It takes time after all to zip up a coat and dig a hat out of the bin. We need to study the armor so we understand it, take the time to pray about it, build our faith and trust in Him. It is far easier to just walk outside. But like a kid, we will only last about 20 minutes before we feel like we are going to lose a toe and want to come back inside. Winter is a hard season, in many ways; I believe it can be a picture of life’s struggles and hardships. Our spiritual life has cycles, just like the seasons of the year - the cold, dormant winter moving into the the spring and the renewal of life.

Winter (physically and spiritually) can be depressing. I think of the part from The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, where the witch made it always winter and never Christmas. Wouldn’t the enemy just love to overwhelm us in our winter seasons. We feel cold, isolated, shut off from the sun (the Son). Yet, God gave us winters in our lives for a purpose, each unique in its lesson. Perhaps you are feeling lonely or you would give anything for some alone time. Perhaps you have been battling health issues and feel as if you have more questions than answers. Or a friendship you counted on has unexpectedly froze. An exciting business venture seems stuck or yet another promotion passed you by. Whatever the “winter” is you are dealing with, God knew it was coming. And while we would much rather he had rerouted the storm, it still hits. Sometimes one after another.

The good news, though, is that you have a loving Parent who knew it would be cold outside. He bought you some winter gear and laid it out by your door. He won’t wrestle you into it, but it is there for the taking. We will feel the chill of this fallen and broken world, and yet, the Lord knew this and prepared a coat to keep you warm during this season of life. It’s so much better with our armor intact. We have a loving Savior who has walked ahead of us. Jesus arrived fully human (as well as fully God), so He knows what it’s like to walk knee-deep in struggles. He left His footprints for us to follow in when we bring shoes (instead of boots) to a snowstorm. His steps lead us to know the Word, to be in communion with our Lord and Savior through prayer and to be in community with other believers. Have you ever been surprised by a neighbor snow blowing your driveway? What an unexpected blessing! In turn, who can we bless even in the midst of our own blizzards? Maybe you can babysit for an overwhelmed mother, invite a lonely co-worker to coffee, offer prayer (and cookies) to a hurting friend, teach a new Christian about the armor of God, or shovel someone’s driveway (more than once in a day?).

What is God doing in this winter of your life?

What lessons?

What calling do we have even during the blizzards?

Look for God’s footprints in the snow (and wear your coat!)

The Christmas Dress

December 06, 2019 by Emily Downs

This post is different than my regular writing. I’m actually sharing a short story (under a different title) that I wrote for a lovely girl’s magazine called Brio. I wrote this piece last year for the December issue and now that I own the rights to the story again, I’m free to share it here. Its just a simple little story that was inspired by my beautiful cousin, Kelsey (but she has great taste in bridesmaids’ dresses).

The Christmas Dress

by Emily Downs

Leave it to her brother to ruin Christmas. Sabina stared in the full-length mirror at her red and green plaid dress with a giant velvet black bow at the back, added for good measure. She looked and felt like she was twelve instead of almost fifteen, her next birthday.

Her mom rushed into the room, “Oh Sabina! You look beautiful.”

“Of course, you would say that! I look like I am starring in a Christmas play of Little Women.”

Mom walked up behind her, “My own little Jo March.”

Sabina spun around. “Mom, I can’t be seen in this. Why do I even have to be in the wedding?”

“It’s an honor to be asked and Delia wanted you and your sister to be a part. I think it was very sweet of her.”

So sweet, Sabina fumed in her head, to dress her like a colonial girl. Not to mention she was now wearing a matching dress with Samantha, her 10-year-old sister, who could not be more annoyingly thrilled about the forced twin outfits.

Sam ran into the room all bouncy ribbons and bows. “Look at us, we look the same.”

“My dream come true,” Sabina said dryly.

Sarcasm was lost on Sam and she beamed.

Mom gave her a look. “Sabina, I want you to remember that this day is not about you. You are a bridesmaid for your brother and Delia, this day is for them.”

“I’m doing it aren’t I? I’m in this dress.” She picked up the plaid dress with disgust, holding it out.

“Your heart isn’t right,” said Mom flatly.

“I can’t make myself like this dress.”

“I’m not asking you to like the dress, but the attitude with which you do things counts just as much as actually doing them.”

Sabina sighed loudly and looked away.

“You know, daughter,” Mom lowered her voice, “The Lord tells us in his Word that He doesn’t look at the outward appearance, but at our hearts. Anybody can go through the motions, but doing it with a loving attitude, that is what pleases God.”

Sabina shrugged, “As long as I’m doing it, what’s it matter?”

Mom touched her shoulder, “You have the chance to bless other people with your attitude, don’t miss out on that today.”

Sam spilled her juice and mom leaped to action to save the dress from a juice stain, which Sabina secretly thought, couldn’t make the dress any worse. She was glad Mom’s attention was off her for a while; she didn’t need a lecture in a good attitude. The pictures would end up all over social media and her whole school would be able to see her humiliation. Nobody seemed to care about that.

She stomped off to the bathroom. Pushing open the door she heard crying. Delia was sitting at one of the vanities crying. Sabina wanted to quietly back out of the room, but Delia spotted her in the mirror.

“Oh, Sabina,” she sniffed, dabbing her eye with a tissue. “Sorry you caught me crying.”

“I’m sorry,” said Sabina, “I can go.” She felt instantly uncomfortable. What if she didn’t want to marry Simon anymore or something awful? She should get her mom.

“Come in.” Delia turned from the mirror and faced her.

“I knew I would be emotional today, but it really just hit me.”

Sabina sat in one of the peach chairs in the lounge area and her plaid dress puffed up around her. She tried to pat it down without making a face.

Delia sighed, “I’m so glad you are in the wedding, it means a lot to me. And you look so pretty in that dress.”

“Sure,” said Sabina with a frozen doll-like smile.

“I don’t know if Simon told you, but my mom loved Christmas. It was her favorite day of the year.”

Sabina’s fake smile slipped a little. “I didn’t know that.” She knew Delia’s mom had passed away when she was in high school, but they had never talked about it.

“I’m not sure how to get through this day without her.” She started crying again.

“I’m sorry,” squeaked Sabina, and she meant it. She had never stopped to think about how hard this day would be for Delia without her mom.

“My mom got married on Christmas Eve, too, and those dresses,” she waved at the plaid fabric engulfing the peach chair, “are the same dresses my mom used when she got married. I showed pictures to the dressmaker and she copied them.”

Sabina stared back at her and felt something start to melt in her heart.

“Well, I better stop crying or I’ll never get my makeup done.” She swiveled back in the chair and started applying blush with a shaky hand.

Sabina watched her for a minute and felt like time had slowed. She looked down at the dress she had hated so much and saw something different. She felt her heart change. The dress was not about her or how she looked or what her friends thought. The dress was about Delia’s mom. About how she was without her mom on her wedding day, something Sabina couldn’t imagine.

“Delia,” she said in quiet voice. “I think this dress is really beautiful.” She wasn’t lying; it really was a beautiful way to honor her future sister-in-law’s mother. She suddenly didn’t care about any of that other stuff. Instantly, she knew that this was what mom meant by blessing others with her attitude.

Delia turned back to her, “Do you really think so? I know they’re old-fashioned, but I think they are really pretty, too.”

“Yes,” said Sabina and tears spilled out. “I’m so sorry you have to do this without your mom.”

“Oh, look now I have you crying; here have a tissue.” She laughed, “We have to pull it together.”

Sabina laughed too and wiped her eyes. “Thanks for letting me be a part of your wedding and for letting me wear this dress.”

Delia got up to hug her. “I’m so excited to have you as a sister. Here, help me with this makeup.”

At the reception, Mom brought Sabina a piece of cake. “You did a great job today. Delia told me what you said to her in the bathroom before the wedding. That you told her the dress was beautiful.” Mom raised an eyebrow.

Sabina took a bite of cake and nodded. “It really is. I mean that it was her mom’s dress. And,” she said reluctantly, “it might have felt good to do it with the right attitude.”

Mom laughed. “You will never regret letting the Lord use you to bless others. And,” she said with a tip of her head, “it just might come back to bless you.”

Sabina rolled her eyes, but then laughed. “I guess I did have fun today.”

“It’s amazing how our heart can change what our eyes see.” Mom hugged her, “Your heart does look beautiful in that dress.”

*********

“For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b

selfie with my story (I love the illustration)

Although this story was written for a young audience it makes me think about the state of my own heart. I can do the right things with the wrong outlook and it falls flat. A Christmas pie dropped on the floor is still a pie, but nobody wants it. As a parent, I’m always talking about doing things with a good attitude because it really does matter. I want the pie served on a plate (preferably with whipped cream); I’m not all that interested in eating it off the floor. Although an argument could be made that floor pie is better than no pie, but it is clearly not the same experience as plated dessert. Eating it off the floor is really not the mood we were all hoping for here. Like Sabina in the story, she was willing to be in the wedding and wear the dress, but her bad attitude was ruining the actions.

How can we change our hearts when it come to the holidays this year? Maybe something as simple as having patience with the long lines at the bakery, asking the harried shop owner how they are doing or waving at an overworked postal carrier. Taking time to really listen (with patience) to that relative that likes to complain and instead of getting annoyed, maybe trying to redirect their thinking towards all their blessings. One less present to buy and to wrap for the kids traded for an extra Christmas story at bedtime. A moment of acknowledgment for the person who lost someone special and is experiencing the holidays without them for the first time.

We go to the work soiree, the family gathering, the school mixer and we are so often overextended that our hearts are not in it. It feels like one more thing to do, one more present to buy, one more veggie tray to pick up. But what if we change our attitudes and look for someone to bless. A sweet outlook can be infectious and perhaps help someone who is really struggling. A merry heart can make a dreaded task sweeter and allows us to bless others in the midst of the swirl of holiday pressures.

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine . . .

Proverbs 17:22a

Drafts on Ebb Tide

November 07, 2019 by Emily Downs

Change is a constant companion in our lives. Like the ebb tide of the waves, the new washes up and the old is swept away. It is relentless. When we are young, this feels slow, as if we will be children forever; remember when summer felt like it would go on forever? One sandy beach day disappeared into the next, marked by dripping popsicles in the hot sun and counting fireflies in the evenings. I never once thought about change on those long carefree days. But change was always there, with me, even when I was unaware. Now as a middling adult, I’m keenly aware of change and the passage of time. My childhood seems a lifetime ago. The changes I have gone through are staggering. The hardships and the growth that followed has formed me into an entirely different person.

As I write, I’m perched at the window bar of a coffee shop and my view consists of blowing leaves and pumpkins on hay bales: it is autumn. This is my favorite season. I identify with its many layers—a clear sun followed by unexpected clouds, cold rain and gusty winds. I have often wondered what our favorite seasons say about us. Fall is a time of change, cooling temps, tall boots and burnt orange sweaters, The days are short, but bright. It is the last brilliant moment before the world resets with a long sweep of cleansing cold, unforgiving air. It is change wrapped around me like a scarf, held in my hands like hot apple cider.

The older I get the more I realize that change is part of the game; it’s not going away. I’m constantly growing and learning. And in that growth, I must face the fact that there needs to be growth, because I’m still not there yet. I see this in my marriage. After 15 years together, we are still figuring it out. Our partnership, all and all, is fairly smooth, but then last weekend we had a fight about a juicer. Yup, a juicer! So guess there is still room for growth there, or at least a glass of carrot juice.

Parenting is arguably the biggest vehicle of growth around. Having a baby is like an instant death to your old self and born in its place is this soft squishy person who cares about bizarre things like the shape of pacifier nipples and who keeps a journal of wet diapers. Who is this person? And in a way you relive your childhood all over again with all the great things, like reading Make Way for Ducklings, but also all the hard things, like when your first fish dies (R.I.P. blue beta fish). And you change. . . you are a parent to a baby and then a toddler and then suddenly the baby is driving. And while you were fine to drive at 16, surely that cannot be true today!

Twisting in the Waves

Change also comes in the form of hardships. Tragedies like divorce, loss or severed relationships that can close off parts of us until they shrivel up and die. We can’t even access that part of our heart anymore. Maybe you have lost someone or perhaps your marriage feels like far more of a struggle than it’s worth, a needy child is chipping away at you and there is no time for anything you enjoy. The grind of life . . . has well. . . ground you up. Those long easy days of summer are a distant memory that play in your head like a movie you watched once. Ten-year-old you would never recognize your life now. Your dream journal seems completely unrealistic. Obviously, you are never going to work for SeaWorld at this point (although, the Blackfish documentary really finished off that dream).

Blackfish aside, I don’t know where you are at today. Perhaps life has come up roses with a few thorns or perhaps it’s thistles with a few flowering weeds. Life is always in motion, the waves are always reaching for us, trying to push us forward or pull us back. Sometimes there is little we can do about our circumstances. My childhood was punctuated with tragedy, there were long summer days and nights on the porch counting fireflies, but storms blew in unexpectedly. Loss and tragedy are big part of my identity. Of who I am. They shaped me young into twisty ways that are taking a lifetime to untangle. But I’m working on it.

The enemy has spent years whispering in my tender ear that this is who I am. That these knots cannot be untangled. The blood supply has been cut off and growth cannot take place. And you know what? In many ways it’s easier to let these areas lie dormant. I’m strangely comfortable in it. Like when your foot falls asleep and you are unaware until you try to move it and as blood flows back into those veins, it is painful. As I have reopened some of my past, it too, is painful; but I no longer want to be pushed into a shape that God did not intend for me.

So I look back at things that happened to me and I start to look at it all through the eyes of the Lord. Sure, He can use these things and He absolutely does, but also He does not want me to be bound up in my losses, my hurts, my disappointments.

When the waves reach for me, I start to sink in the quicksand of my emotions, being sucked under by the past. Bound—unable to swim; sinking into depression and despair. At times, the Lord sends others to swim along side of me to encourage me to keep swimming; but more so, Jesus Christ, my Savior, wants to see me unbound, free to swim over the surface of what tries to pull me down.

He will Walk on Water

When our minds turn to depression/anger/bitterness/ apathy, we start to feel the weight of our past, our pain, the things that haven’t worked out. It’s too heavy, we are tempted to stop swimming and just sink. We look away from God and we start to go under. We are trying to swim with broken legs and twisted arms. If we are standing on the beach and we see our child or a friend struggling in the water, would we not rush out to help them? Of course! And God our Father does the same. If we cry out, He will walk on water to save us from sinking. But more so then save us from drowning this one time, He wants to teach us to keep our eyes on Him so we don’t sink; showing us how to navigate rough waters, to swim because He knows storms will arise often in our lives. While I want Him to remove me out of the water altogether and put me up on dry land, He knows the world we live in and that it will never stop trying to pull us out to the depths. In John 16:33, Jesus says, “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

The waves will roll over my head, the enemy will try to convince me to stop swimming. But the Lord, the Lord Almighty will teach me to swim. The Holy Spirit will buoy me, the Great Physician will heal me, the power of Christ will strengthen me. We will face my crippling hurts together and He will breathe new life into the dead parts of my soul. He will unshackle the weights the enemy has chained to my limbs, and teach me to use them again. I will keep my eyes ever on Him—reading His word to renew my mind and speaking His truth to my hurting spirit. I pray in the power that changes things, changes me; I try (in His power) to cast off the old weights and get my stride. It does not come easy, it is work. I’m fighting the current. But the more I immerse myself in the things of the Lord, the stronger I become. I can only write about this because I have lived it. I have been bound up and I have been set free. Matthew 11:28 says: “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest! “ The ebb tide will never stop, but the difference now is that (in Him) I can navigate the rough waters—I can swim..

In what ways is the ebb trying to take you out? How are your limbs bound up?

What would it look if you let the Lord unwind the areas in your life that are twisted up?

Are you being called to help someone else learn to swim?